Common tips for a first date typically involve what to wear, how to speak, and what questions to ask. But, what about what not to do? Most singles can agree that first dates are extremely exciting, but at the same time nerve racking. First impressions are everything and can be ruined in an instant. In addition, knowing what to discuss can be particularly challenging. Not only are you being judged by your physical appearance, but your character is also under the spotlight. If you accidentally say the wrong thing or reveal too much information too soon, your date may misjudge you or become instantly turned off. As a result, the entire date can be ruined just from simply mentioning the wrong subject.
Here are 7 Crucial Tips for a First Date
1. Ex-Significant Others
Mentioning past boyfriends or girlfriends is an all-around bad idea. Old flames should never be the topic of conversation. One of the biggest tips for a first date is to avoid discussing exes. Nobody wants to hear about how your ex-lover cheated on you or left you for another person. Especially on the first date. This is definitely a sign one may not be over the situation, or he or she may be scarred. Even if this is not the case, it certainly will appear to be. A person still carrying heavy baggage from a previous relationship is a red flag.
2. Past Mistakes or Regrets
Everyone makes mistakes. Especially in relationships. But a first date is not the time to express regrets. A person that doesn’t know you well may inaccurately judge your character by past mistakes and be leery of moving forward. For instance, if a guy mentions he is a recovering sexaholic with regrets of hurting so many people, his date may become overly concerned with his previous life and be turned off. Therefore, one should always wait to discuss mistakes of the past. First dates should be fun and light. Not heavy and draining.
3. Finances
The topic of income and where a person stands financially is without a doubt important. However, not on a first date. On a future date, yes. But discussing income, credit standing, or wealth the very first time you meet someone is a no-no. As previously mentioned, it can be quite easy for a person to misjudge your character on a first date. Therefore, super personal topics should be avoided. Save it for later.
4. Current Dating Life
Never discuss the current state of your dating life on a first date. One should never allow his/her date to know the details of what’s going on behind the scenes prematurely. Whether you are dating multiple people or not dating anyone at all, don’t dish the dirt quite yet. This is perhaps one of the best tips for a first date one can have. Wait a while and observe which direction the two of you will go. All your date needs to know is if you are single or in a committed relationship. That’s it.
5. Politics
Politics are a sure way to stir things up on a first date. Especially with all the political turmoil we currently have in our world. Briefly mentioning your political party affiliation may be appropriate. However, indulging in a deep conversation about the judicial system, racism, or abortion may not be the best topics for an initial meeting. Quite possibly, you may be on the same page with your date. But if not, it could turn out terribly. Let your date get to know you first so when the topic comes up, he or she will not be so quick to miscalculate or misunderstand you. Very useful and appropriate tips for a first date.
6. Low Self-Esteem Issues
Don’t be a Debbie Downer or a Sad Sammy on a first date. If you are suffering from low self-esteem, try your hardest not to display it. Try to show enthusiasm about your date and enjoy the experience. Though you may be self-conscious and feel slightly uncomfortable, your date may think you are absolutely wonderful. Don’t complain too much about your appearance or how undeserving you feel because your date may notice the negative vibes (which can be a turn-off). Just relax, think happy thoughts, and remember how awesome you are!
7. Anything Negative
Some people are just so negative. They will complain about the restaurant food, parking, the weather … you name it, it’s a complaint. Try to steer away from complaining altogether. It is an awfully bad first impression. In fact, many second dates fail to occur because of the negativity present from the first one. Negative people are draining and unpleasant to be around. Unless you are purposefully attempting to ruin a date, refrain from being negative as much as possible.
These seven crucial tips for a first date will without a doubt allow the flow of your initial introduction to be at ease. So many dates are ruined from merely discussing the wrong things. Don’t make the mistake of improper discussion.
Treat the first date as you would an interview. In a nutshell, that is what it is; a chance for the other person to learn about you. Unfortunately, assumptions are usually made, both good and bad. Your goal is to make the best impression you can make while presenting the most genuine version of yourself as possible.
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